just another WOC in the DMV posting on all things love, politics, and power.
Many forms of partner abuse spill over onto the children, but some are hard to put a name to. What do you call it when a man, furious at his wife, peels out of the driveway in the family car, so that the mother has to drag her three children across town on a hot bus to their doctor’s appointment? What label do we use when children develop a strong attachment to their mother’s best friend, who is like an aunt to them, and the father abruptly decrees one day that she is no longer allowed in the house because he does not like her, so the children cannot see her? What do we say of the impact on children when a mother gets the news that she is pregnant with a fourth child, her second unwanted pregnancy, because her partner refuses to use birth control and won’t take no for an answer when he wants sex?
If children don’t see or hear the abusive man’s mistreatment of their mother, they feel the aftershocks. They see her pain, they feel her withdrawal, they hear whisperings among their older siblings about what happened."
- When Dad Hurts Mom: Helping Your Children Heal the Wounds of Witnessing Abuse by Lundy Bancroft (via thechocolatebrigade)
I don’t have enough money for my basic needs.
Working 40+ hours just to pay my rent
Now I don’t even have a single cent
Tuition is high, I gotta pay for books
Oh i’m so broke and I don’t wanna look
I popped open my wallet, no funds to count
my credit declined and my check just bounced
Oh, there daddy, daddy betta bring that TAP
Oh, baby, baby where my FASFA at?
I interviewed a young anthropologist working with women in Mali, a country in Africa where women go around with bare breasts. They’re always feeding their babies. And when she told them that in our culture men are fascinated with breasts there was an instant of shock. The women burst out laughing. They laughed so hard, they fell on the floor.
They said, “You mean, men act like babies?”"
Carolyn Latteier, Breasts, the women’s perspective on an American obsession
Arundhati Roy (1990s)